Waiting in Line in Thailand: Cultural Norm Clash

An Asian Thing?  

A Chinese Thing?  

Because I am planning retirement in Thailand in the summer of 2020, I am now a member of several Facebook groups formed by English-speaking expats living in Thailand.  One member posted this inquiry:

Several people I know, including myself, have been “cut” in line when it’s clear (from our perspective) that we are next in line to be served— Whether this be at 7-Eleven, the coffee shop, or the French fry truck at the pool.

Like, we will be waiting patiently when suddenly someone will just cut, order, and get served before us.

It’s baffling, because in America, that’s a huge, rude no-no.

So we wonder,

Are we cue-ing incorrectly? Like should we be more assertive with the server so they (and everyone else) know we are next?

Could it be a micro-aggression toward foreigners?

Could it be a general lack of awareness of some people...?

Has anybody else had this experience? Do you know why?! 😂

The comments to the post quickly stated several points of view.

First, quite a few folks had had the same experience.  One person said:

This drives me insane! Happened to me a lot in Hong Kong and China too. I’m obviously the next person in line and i get cut and the sever helps that person. Doesn’t even care that I’m standing there waiting

Another person agreed, but added some additional context, especially about cultural expectations that can lead to conflict.

I've always experienced this, if I am bothered, I just remind them I was queuing and they usually apologize and smile. I don't think it's an aggressiveness towards foreigners. Just a different ettiquette here. Big no-no in UK too. The driving ettiquette is pretty much the same.

Soon, people began suggesting that cutting in an established line is associated with Asian culture, especially Chinese culture.

Queuing properly is one of the biggest annoyances I have in Asia as a whole. Makes me so happy when I get back to North America.
If you don’t take your place, someone will. With the amount of people in Asia it’s really the only way to get something done for yourself. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’ve had to learn how to “be rude”... but in Asia it’s not necessarily rude. Just because we think it is, doesn’t make it so.

Another person agreed, but suggested that the ever increasing number of Chinese tourists may see line cutting as clever:

It's a cultural thing not isolated to Thailand but seen in some other Asian countries too. If you have read Tai-Pan by James Clavell, he asks a Chinese woman why they cut. Her answer was something to the effect that she was not stupid so why would she stand in line when she is smart enough to get to the front. It used to be a lot worse here. Some businesses started actually training employees not to allow it. They never used to say anything to people who cut, like blatantly put their produce to be weighed in front of you when you are in line. Airport security lines were nuts too.

Several people had developed coping strategies:

Happens all the time to me! At first I would be in shock and start talking to myself, like wth? 🤔 but now, when I see anyone trying to jump in front if me I immediately jump in front of them... sometimes saying something smart like, oh no ya don't! 😂😂

Another person was equally as assertive:

It happens to me and also the standing so close they might as well be wearing my clothes. For cutting when it's my turn I jump right on up to the register and proceed. When they are that close I look at them and start moving in their direction. Once they move back I step back up where I was. They usually look so confused 🤣🤣😂😂😂

One person offered this graphic.  She said:

I found this culture graphic helpful, illustrating the difference between how to queue in the West vs. East. This is even more obvious in China-- but people will often line up in Thailand in more Western style.

Finally, a few people had had a very different experience.

Wow. I have the totally opposite experience, Never anyone cut me and many times they will smile and ask me to come in front of them. This is so strange because for me the Thai are the most polite and humble.

One person did not mind the extra few seconds of waiting caused by the line cut.  She assumed they were in a bigger hurry than she.

This last comment suggests that we have many experiences during any given day. Some of them are "sticky" and upset you.  Most of the experiences are not sticky, but just "flow through us."

I am waiting to see what in Thai culture will be "sticky" for me.  What about my U.S. culture will be sticky for Thais?